Your Story Matters Amanda Voigt - Infertility

"Though paved with pain and heartache, the seasons I struggled the most have also become the seasons I cherish the most. For in those seasons, I found myself at the feet of a good, good Father, lavished with grace, mercy and hope." - Amanda Voigt

SHOW NOTES

“I never thought I would do something like this.”

Amanda’s journey with infertility. How did it all unravel?

“It’s lonely.” “Your friends get the dream and you’re not.”

“I had to be excited to see my best friend’s baby in the hospital.”

How does it feel when people try to “Christianese” your suffering.
“It’s a blow when you’re already down.”
You just need to sit with someone and try to feel what they are feeling.
Don’t try and make it better or find answers for them.

How did you manage the process of infertility?
Looking to adopt.
Insurance ended up paying for it with Luke’s new job.
Do what you need to do,...

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Four things every couple needs to know about sex

Today we are talking about sex, possibly one of the greatest gifts outside of eternal life God ever gave humankind! To help us with this conversation, Dave Willis of strongermarriages.com, is going to lend his expertise...and trust me, this guy has millions of readers, likes, and more.

Coming up next we talk about the 4 things every couple needs to know about sex.

About Dave and Ashley Willis (www.strongermarriages.com)

  • Almost 1 million likes on their Facebook page! https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriages/
  • Millions of readers on their blog
  • Pastor at Stevens Creek Church near Augusta, Georgia
  • Authors of The 7 Day Marriage Challenge (Husband edition and Wife edition)

4 things every couple needs to know about sex

Where do you come up with all this great content?
Who was your inspiration to get into marriage ministry?
What’s the worst fight you and Ashley have had?

  1. Most MEN see sex as a form of stress relief while most WOMEN need stress relief BEFORE they can be in mindset to...
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The four most important things to know about your marriage

Did you ever have that friend in college that you just couldn’t get rid of?  Me too, in fact, I’ve been trying to get rid of the guy on my show today for more than 20 years!  But now he’s made it onto my podcast, and he’s actually got something very cool he wants to share with you today.  

We are talking cars, marriage, and possibly the four most important things you need to maintain in order for your marriage to thrive!

SHOW NOTES

  1. Drive Your Marriage Car Forward
  2. The four tires on your marriage car:
    1. Emotional
    2. Mental
    3. Physical
    4. Spiritual
  3. Emotional
  4. Mental
    1. Worldview
    2. A.B.C. Principle
    3. Positives and Negatives
  5. Physical
    1. “Life is more a both and not an either or.”
  6. Spiritual
    1. Do not worry. Fear is real but for the believer we are demanded not to worry.
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Is oral sex allowed for a Christian couple

I just received this question and it jumped right off the page at me!

We have just ordered over $400 worth of books, workbooks, cd’s and dvd’s from you and your family……..we are desperate……I just have to ask one question………I have to have an answer to this question before I can get past some issues……….it is this………..

“Is oral sex something that is OK with the Lord, and, is it ok to dress up in a little nurse costume, or such.

I know this sounds so crazy, but I am about to go out of my mind needing to know the answers to this question! We have two boys coming up and I want them to have the best life possible in the Lord………these questions are just not talked about enough!

Thank you for your time and answer. May God richly bless you and all of your family!

MICHAEL: I hate couples who miss out on the joy of sex with each other because they think there are...

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Menopause - an interview with an expert

What a show today! I get to interview Rhonda Jolliffe, the founder of rhondanp.com.  What's so great about the show today? We have one of the most honest and frank conversations about menopause ever!  Rhonda has great insight for women who might be experiencing menopause but we also address how menopause impacts a relationship and what to do about it.

  • About 20 years helping women through menopause
  • The creator of rhondanp.com
  • Get a free course, just visit rhondanp.com/smalley
  • Understand the positives of menopause.
  • Does menopause help creativity for women?
  • What are some of the best things women can do for menopause?
  • Tips for husbands with wives going through menopause.
  • Andropause, it’s menopause for men!
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How to end it well

Today Seth Johnson is taking over the show. So everything we talk about is something he wanted, and he got.

  • Seth wants to talk about ending well.
  • Every good thing sometimes comes to an end
    • Dating, marriage, business, etc.
  • How to end well
    • “Ending well means intentionally setting aside time for reflection and acknowledgment, time to name the cost, the enormity of the work and everything that has gone into it, and name the moments of grace and beauty that helped carry us through.” The Allender Center
    • Don’t dismiss it or avoid it
    • Embrace the awkwardness
    • Don’t lie
  • What are your favorite memories?
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Get to know your mate's inner child

Intimacy is more than just hanging out with each other or sharing your deepest emotions.  It is also important to get to know each other.  These questions can help you learn a little bit more about each other's inner child:

  1. What's your earliest childhood memory?
  2. Who was your best friend growing up?  What was your favorite thing about this friend?
  3. Who was your biggest influence growing up and why?
  4. If you could go back and change one thing about your childhood, what would it be?
  5. What was your favorite TV show growing up as a kid?
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Does what we teach possibly harm your relationship?

“You've talked about taking a timeout when things get too heated. I feel my husband uses this phrase as a way of avoiding the problems we face. Unfortunately, communication in our marriage has become so unpleasant and difficult that timeouts have become a lifestyle and we have virtually no communication. I'm talking like years and years, at least 15. At this point I feel we have no connection and no relationship, along with so many unresolved issues I don't even know where to start. We have been married for 35 yrs. I don't want to give up, but I do not want to live the rest of my life with a hostile stranger. HELP!!!”

  • Why in the world could everything we teach be bad?
    • Because you can twist anything good and make it bad...anything!
    • This is why Jesus made such a big deal about our hearts, our intentions, the true desire behind our actions.
  • It matters WHY you are doing something.
    • Timeouts are good, but bad when
      • “I feel my husband uses this phrase as a way of...
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Is it ok to walk away from your marriage?

Today we take on one of the shortest, yet intense question asked by a listener yet! I’ll just let you read it for yourself, “Is there a walking away point in marriage?”  I don’t know...is there? We’ll answer this question on today's show.

“My wife wants a divorce, I do not. She wants the four kids and I am supposed to move out. I want reconciliation, she says ‘No chance, ever!’ What do I do?”

  • Respect the boundary even though it seems counterproductive
  • Give her the space she is demanding
  • Let her know you would love a chance to hear what you can do to repair the relationship, but you’ll be patient till she is ready
  • In the meantime
    • Get help
    • Counseling, mentor, discipleship
  • Make changes
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Talking to yourself makes a huge impact

On Saturday Night Live, a character named Stuart Smalley used to say, “I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and dog gone it people like me.” I’m not sure we’ve ever had a better introduction to the show...ever! Today we discuss the benefits of talking to yourself and how it can positively impact your relationships.

An articles in the NY Times by Kristin Wong “The Benefits of Talking to Yourself”

  • Talking to yourself can impact you positively when it comes to relationships
  • Two types of talking to one’s self
    • Instructional self-talk
      • Talking yourself through a task
    • Motivational self-talk
      • “I can do this!”
  • It doesn’t have to be out-loud, internal self-talk works too
    • Ethan Kross, a professor of psychology at the University of Michigan
      • They found that when their subjects talked about themselves in the second or third person — for example, “You can do this” or “Jane can do this” instead...
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