SMALLEY INSTITUTE

1. The health of your emotional relationship

1. If you don’t feel loved, you don’t want to show love

2. The specific things you are doing to kill your sexual intimacy

1. Invalidation

1. How you respond to your spouse matters.

2. Lack of affirmation

3. Negative beliefs

3. Here’s how you eliminate them

1. Invalidation

1. Start to validate each other

2. Empathize

2. Lack of affirmation

1. Make a list of what you appreciate about your spouse (you can do this on our app)

2. Don’t wait till you feel like affirming your spouse, do it because it is the right thing to do. Your spouse isn’t pure evil!

3. Negative beliefs

1. Ask questions

2. Assume the best instead of the worst all the time

Each one of these fixes takes important choices.  Stop acting like a victim and do the right thing regardless of whether your spouse deserves it.

If you want to catch up on the previous episodes of the series, Tonight, then click here: ...

1. Initiate don’t hesitate… “So slide over here; And give me a moment; Your moves are so raw; I've got to let you know; I've got to let you know; You're one of my kind…”

2. “Honestly, do you really even need a list?” so said my 20 yr old daughter!

3. Be open to change and creativity.

4. Build excitement and anticipation.

5. Serve up a five star meal, meat and potatoes or a fast food meal.

6. Enjoy sex with him, because he truly desires your pleasure too!

7. Stop criticizing him for being a man, sex is not just for pleasure, it is also his way to bond with you and connect emotionally.

8. Leave the lights on for a possible change, men tend to be visually stimulated.

9. Be affirming.

10. Plan sex.  That’s right, talk with your husband and discover how many times he’d enjoy having sex in a month and what kinds of things he enjoys.

 If you have missed any of the previous episodes, just click here.

• This is actually not that difficult! It begins and ends with placing high value and honoring your wife.  Make her #1 and sex is an outpouring of how much she feels loved!
• Be a great dad! Sounds sick, but trust us, it does the trick!
• Overwhelm her with affirmation about her life, her looks, and her future.
• It’s old advice, but it is still true today.  Be a listener.  If you are a typical man who loves to solve problems, it doesn’t necessarily work with your wife.  Most times she just wants to be heard and validated.
• Ask her the trillion dollar question…”What are things I could do for you that really help you get in the mood?”  Then do those things out of a desire to server her, not get sex!
• Clean, the Mr. Clean commercial couldn’t be more real (at least for most women). https://youtu.be/GDzMxlw2Fgo
• Be thoughtful. Look for opportunities to do loving things for your wife on a weekly basis (daily ultimately)....

1. What kind of boundaries does the bible give around sex and marriage?
1. Be honoring, kind, serving, patient….loving!
2. That’s it!
3. Leviticus 18:6-23
1. 6 “‘No one is to approach any close relative to have sexual relations. I am the Lord.
2. “‘Do not dishonor your father by having sexual relations with your mother. She is your mother; do not have relations with her. “‘Do not have sexual relations with your father’s wife; that would dishonor your father. 9 “‘Do not have sexual relations with your sister, either your father’s daughter or your mother’s daughter, whether she was born in the same home or elsewhere. 10 “‘Do not have sexual relations with your son’s daughter or your daughter’s daughter; that would dishonor you. 11 “‘Do not have sexual relations with the daughter of your father’s wife, born to your father; she is your sister. 12 “‘Do not have sexual...

Married sex is the best sex

1. Why do a series of shows on sex? Married sex is the best sex!
1. Because it seems as though this is the topic of conversation you, the listener is most interested in.
2. Our number one show is titled “Is Oral sex allowed for a Christian couple”.
3. Oddly enough most couples don’t ever truly learn about the needs and desires of their spouse...so we are going to help facilitate a conversation about them.
4. There is still a lot of misinformation out there for couples, we want to clear the air and get you on the right path for a healthy sex life.
2. Let’s start off this series with some good ole healthy facts and figures about sex and the married couple
1. Married people have the best sex
1. Sex isn’t only about personal pleasure, it’s about loving someone unconditionally and meeting their needs intimacy wise.
2. PsychologyToday.com “For example, if you have sex twice a week you may experience the equivalent of being two years younger...