What is one word that will change my marriage?

* assist
* help
* benefit
* do a kindness
* go fifty-fifty
* gratify the wishes of
* make room
* meet halfway
* meet the wants
* take it
* be kind enough to bend over backward
* don't make waves
* meet the needs of
* meet the wants of
* put oneself out for
* grin and bear it
* do a kindness to
* treat well
* dote on
* take care of

The one word is SERVE.

1. It puts everything in perspective
2. It creates an environment for change
3. It matures you

How do I stay with someone when they:

• Consistently shift blame
• Take no personal responsibility
• Blame their behaviors on their childhood
• Gaslight most conversations that are emotional
• Can’t validate my feelings
• Makes mountains out of molehills and molehills out of mountains.
• Doesn’t follow through

Here's what you do:

1. Catch and release
2. Stop focusing on what’s broken
3. The real issue is your dependence on him to make you happy

An answer to the question, "Where do you get help when the only reason you are still married is that 1) divorce is too expensive, and 2) homicide is illegal. (No, this is not a prank question. The only reason I have stayed this long is the above. I have gotten some really bad advice over the years, most of it from 'Christian counselors' and clergy.)"

A fellow learner wants to know, "What is the single best predictor of whether a couple who goes through your program will make it."

Get the rest of these notes, an epic, in-depth online experience, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, the downloads and couples exercises, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.

The problem may be with you trying to get her to love you again.

Get the rest of these notes, an epic, in-depth online experience, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, the downloads and couples exercises, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.

Is it always up to one spouse to instigate sex? Wouldn't it leave the instigator feeling under wanted if they are always having to start the festivities?

Get the rest of these notes, an epic, in-depth online experience, 24/7 digital access to coaching from Dr. Michael Smalley, the downloads and couples exercises, a path towards healing your pain, tools to shape your communication and intimacy, assessments to guide you, and a community of support from people who will cheer you on as you journey to the relationship you want. Join the VIP Inner Circle! Learn more.