The Reluctant Missionary

Authentic stories from the travels of Michael Smalley.

Your Story Matters John and Erin Kadleck

addiction infidelity smalley marriage radio your story matters May 01, 2018

Have you ever wanted to quit on your relationship, because you feel like it’s just too hard?  We’ve got another episode of Your Story Matters today, meet John and Erin Kadleck.

  1. Your story is God’s story.  He gets the glory for your redemption.

  2. They rushed to get married, because he was getting deployed to Afghanistan.

    1. “He came back a different person.”

    2. “He was keeping things from me to protect me.”

  3. As he withdrew, she felt more rejected and felt like it was her fault.

  4. John would drink himself to sleep every night.

  5. Poor communication spiraled out-of-control.

  6. Sometimes our hearts are in the right place, but we have poor execution.

  7. John’s fear was that if he shared his struggles or fears, Erin would reject him.

    1. Holding the secrets from her, was a dark cloud in their relationship.

    2. After he shared, all Erin did was hug John.

  8. Erin had a strong commitment, and it was her commitment to the marriage and John that kept them together through the hard times.

  9. “I was pushing her away, isolating myself, and then getting upset that she wasn’t giving me what I wanted.”

  10. “Can people look at our marriage and see God.”

  11. John had to take ownership for his actions.  “Whatever heat rounds she sent my way, I deserved it, and I needed to take it.”

  12. The only way John could overcome the ography addiction and the shame from the affair was to run to God.  He had to pray through breaking the cycle of addiction and surrendering to God. “Break these chains for me!”


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