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The Reluctant Missionary

Authentic stories from the travels of Michael Smalley.

The biggest killers to sexual intimacy and how to eliminate them

sexual intimacy tonight Jul 10, 2018

  1. The health of your emotional relationship

    1. If you don’t feel loved, you don’t want to show love

  2. The specific things you are doing to kill your sexual intimacy

    1. Invalidation

      1. How you respond to your spouse matters.

    2. Lack of affirmation

    3. Negative beliefs

  3. Here’s how you eliminate them

    1. Invalidation

      1. Start to validate each other

      2. Empathize

    2. Lack of affirmation

      1. Make a list of what you appreciate about your spouse (you can do this on our app)

      2. Don’t wait till you feel like affirming your spouse, do it because it is the right thing to do. Your spouse isn’t pure evil!

    3. Negative beliefs

      1. Ask questions

      2. Assume the best instead of the worst all the time

Each one of these fixes takes important choices.  Stop acting like a victim and do the right thing regardless of whether your spouse deserves it.

If you want to catch up on the previous episodes of the series, Tonight, then click here: https://www.smalleyinstitute.com/blog?tag=tonight

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