The Reluctant Missionary

Authentic stories from the travels of Michael Smalley.

The affection connection - Intimacy Intelligence 2

intimacy intelligence marriage Dec 11, 2018

Today we are talking about the sound of intimacy and what you can do to make intimacy sound beautiful! And it’s not dirty.

The Distraction of the Day:

So now that I know how much cockroaches freak you out. I’m going to fly through this show just to get to this distraction of the day! Yea, it has cockroaches!

Honoring News of the Day:

Mom Brought to Tears When Airline Stranger Gives Up First Class Seat for Her Sick Daughter


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If you want intimacy you got to sound intimate! Affectionate words and actions are the most important thing you can do to grow your intimacy and stay connected.

It’s about actions of kindness, tenderness and devotion. “Affectionate words and actions show love, liking, or compassion. Kissing on the cheek, holding hands, and hugging are all affectionate. This word usually doesn't apply to sexual situations: being affectionate is a lot more innocent than that. Parents and children, teachers and students, brothers and sisters — they can all be affectionate to each other. It's hard to fake being affectionate, so we tend to be affectionate to people we genuinely like.” 

What does it look like?

Really listening

  • Specific kind actions on a daily level
  • Verbally affirm
  • Soft touch

Studies by Horan, Booth-Butterfield 2008 found that received affection impacts relationship satisfaction and expressed affection impacts your commitment to the relationship. (



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