The Church Marriage Strategy

churches marriage Dec 05, 2017

Why we are doing a show like today is beyond me! Because I know at first, you’re going to be thinking to yourself, “How is this going to help me? I’m not a pastor or a leader at a church.” Well my listening friends, all that needs to change today. Because you need to know what an effective church marriage strategy looks like so you can begin harassing your church leadership to implement it. But it can also help your relationship specifically, if you’re willing to do the same things for your own marriage.

  • The Church Marriage Strategy
  • What every church in the world should be doing
    • Why don’t they, because pastor’s marriage isn’t up to snuff
    • They don’t want to come across condemning to those who have divorced
    • They don’t want to “support” divorce
  • What best describes the marriage ministry in your church?
    • An event we do every year in February
    • Our pastor preaches on marriage at least once a year
    • We have a counselor on staff
    • We use marriage curriculum in our small groups
  • What is the primary goal of a marriage ministry?
    • To make disciples of Jesus Christ
    • Helping couples with their relationship is not enough
    • Utilizing the marriage ministry at your church to point every couple to
    • Christ is most important
    • Individuals who want a healthy relationship are naturally more open to an authentic relationship with Jesus
  • Jesus’ commands are at the heart of any great marriage
    • Turn the other cheek
    • Walk the extra mile
    • Forgive
    • Be humble
    • Be kind
    • We could go on and on
  • There are three main pillars to an effective church marriage strategy
    • Prepare
    • This is the #1 way to reduce the risk of divorce in your church
    • Turn wedding into opportunities to further connect with couples
    • Premarital education is required
    • Give them a gift basket during the honeymoon that helps connect them to a mentor couple or small group in the church
  • Strengthen
    • This is the #2 thing you can do for the couples already married in your church
    • Provide opportunities for fun, classes, enrichment, and community
    • For those churches where small groups is difficult, you can do the large group/small group method.
  • Save
    • For the couples who slip through the cracks and end up in trouble, there needs to be a plan for reconciliation
    • Meeting with mentors
    • Doing a Smalley Marriage Intensive
  • Here’s the best part of this strategy, it makes the job of the pastor in charge of marriage significantly easier
    • His or her primary job is to recruit a team of mentors to lead each of the three key strategies or pillars
    • It’s the mentors who do the work with couples, the pastor’s job is to lead the team of mentors


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